Saturday, August 4, 2018

My Preeeecccciiiooouuuss

Yesterday, SB brought donuts to work to commemorate her third work anniversary.  I could smell them all the way down the hall, and the aroma intensified as I got closer and closer to the box.  It was like a reverse Doppler Effect for smell.  I was so tempted to eat one, because they looked delicious.  But I refrained because I’m in training for another race, and I don’t want to have to run extra to burn off the extra sugars.

I told HR that I was being taunted by the smell of the donuts, and she said, “How do you think I feel?  I have to smell them and look at them all day!”  I guess the fact that she’s still doing this vegan thing, and the donuts most likely were made with eggs and milk, makes it worse for her.  She can’t even have a weak moment and give in to the temptation, like I almost did.

HR said that she was over at her friend’s house the other night, and she saw some vegan chocolate cookies that she had brought him to try still sitting on his counter.  She wanted a cookie so badly that she couldn’t stop thinking about them.  She stole glances at the cookies from the other room.  Her mind would wander to their chocolatey goodness wasting away in the other room.  She was obsessed.  I told her that I could imagine her holding a vegan chocolate cookie lovingly in her hand, stroking it gently, and whispering, “My preeeecccciiiooouuuss.”  And just like the ring of power in the Lord of the Rings would speak to someone else and tempt them if it thought its current owner was weak or neglecting it, that vegan chocolate cookie was speaking to her.  It was tempting her to take it away from her friend and treat it properly…to savor it…to lick it from her fingers…to hoover the crumbs from the bowl.  It was her precious.

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