Today, CC called me to complain about something related to his son. It seems like the only time CC calls me anymore is to complain about something…his new house, his landlord, his stress level, his students, his son, etc. I listen, but I no longer participate in the “woe is me” party anymore. I don’t really share much about my life or complain about anything anymore, because there’s no point. He always tries to ask and goad me into chiming in, almost like my misery validates his own. But I’m tired of fixating on only the negative in life. I want to be happier and focus on happy things. I don’t want to be upset and depressed all the time.
So, I tried to raise his spirits. When he asked how I was doing, I told him that I was playing with my toy skeleton. His response was one of confusion and concern. (Surely I must be two steps from the mental hospital.) So, I told him about the newest member of our family, Boney. I described the antics and funny things the skeleton does each day, and how he’s brought such joy to our lives.
I thought he’d laugh and joke. Instead, he said, “How do you have that much time? Seems like a waste of time for someone so busy.” And I ended the conversation right there. That’s someone that wants to wallow in misery. That is not someone calling a friend to help pull them out if it.
It’s
really sad. He used to be a fun guy to talk to, but now I find myself avoiding
his calls. If I do pick up, like today, I just wonder what I was thinking. The
ironic thing is that Boney is not a waste of time. Living life only looking for
the problems and negatives is the waste of time. I’m choosing to be happy. And
if it’s a toy skeleton that brings me joy, then I’m choosing Boney…even over my
depressing friends.
