Friday, June 22, 2007

The Official Royal Decree of Marriage


I was explaining to my wife one day about the finer points of our relationship. I was telling her that the Official Royal Decree states that first and foremost I am the King of Our Domain. She tries to counter that she is the Queen of Our Domain, so we are equal. My reply to this is that she is the Queen by marriage only. She was a Princess when I met her and stayed a Princess after we were married until her requisite 2-year probationary period was over. Therefore, as a Queen by marriage only she is not entitled to as many votes as I am, and therefore we are not, in fact, equal.

This of course leads me to the second point of the Official Royal Decree. I have two and a half votes to her one vote in the Family Counsel. After exclaiming that that isn’t fair at all, she asks me why two and a half votes. To which I reply, “That way even if you get a friend to side with you, I can still veto the vote.”

This transitions us into the third point of the Official Royal Decree. For every child that is born to us I get another vote awarded to me in the Family Counsel. That way no matter how many children she gets to side with her on a given point, I will still hold absolute veto power.

Completely flabbergasted by this whole conversation she asks me when the Official Royal Decree was written, because she never agreed to it. To which I calmly reply that it was in the fine print of our marriage contract, and so she did, in fact, agree to it and should have gotten a lawyer to check the details before she signed it. As she profusely claims that it was not there, I look her straight in the eyes and ask her how she missed it since it was written in 0.02 font!

So it shall be written! So it shall be done!

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