The Secret Life of Shoes

There's a lady in my dad’s church that was collecting used shoes to fund a mission trip. I'm curious to know what she plans to do with the shoes to make money. Surely nobody would buy used shoes...you would just donate them, right? So I decided that the only logical answer was that she's going to start a YouTube channel where people can pay to watch her hidden closet cam. All day long they can sit enthralled at what really goes on behind closed doors. Perhaps they already have the hidden cams, but people were losing interest in only watching brand new, expensive shoes. So they decided to introduce some chaos, to see what would happen if used shoes were put together with new shoes. Imagine the drama and appeal as the used shoes corrupt the innocence of the new shoes. Imagine when one day you turn on the cam and find that a left used tennis shoe has paired up with a right new high heel. Imagine the scandal!

The Horse and His Rider (A Short Story)

A rider rides up to a tree where two other horses are already tied up. He dismounts and says to the horse, "We're resting here for a few minutes, but don't get comfortable because we'll be riding out soon. But while we have some time, I'd like to take a moment to address your performance lately." 

The horse neighs in disapproval. The rider walks around and looks the horse in the eye, holding the reins by the side of his face. "Don't give me that, you know what you did. It would take too long to talk about everything, so I want to focus on two things." 

The horse blows his lips at him. "I'm going to ignore that comment. Now, your ninja-walk...lets be honest here...it sucks. You know how to do it, but you just won't. There are times in our line of work where we need to be stealth. But you...you just clomp around all over the place." The rider walks to the side of the horse and starts to tie a rope to the saddle. "I've told you more than once, you need to walk on the outside edge of your hoof...the outside edge." 

The horse reaches back and starts to try to untie the rope with his teeth. "Stop that! That's another thing, your attitude needs some work. You can't keep treating me like this. I'm the rider and you're the horse. There is an order to these things." The horse reaches back and tries to untie the rope again, but the rider shoos him away. "This is not a democracy. When I say something, you do it. This constant undermining of my orders is making me look bad in front of the other riders. Besides, you don't know the full scope of the plans, so you can't see the big picture. That's on a need to know basis, and you need to trust that I have our best interest at heart." 

The horse tries to untie the rope again. The rider sighs in frustration and throws his hands in the air, "Are you even listening? Am I talking to myself here? This...this is what I'm talking about!" The rider starts to walk away and turns back to the horse. "This conversation is not over. When I get back, we're going to address your tendency to walk under every low-hanging tree branch you can find!" The horse neighs in laughter. The rider groans in disgust and walks away, shaking his head in defeat.