I have several strange and playful things that I say when I am faking being upset. Things like, “Do you want to take this inside!” Or, “Don’t make me come over there and slap myself!” Or, “Let’s go then! I can take you with both your arms tied behind your back!”
But the one I am probably most famous for is when I say, “Do I need to take off my shoe?!” My wife thinks this is really funny. She says that I only threaten with the shoe when it is something big. So, if I tell her that I almost took my shoe off, then she knows somebody must have really irritated me.
I think I started this after I heard an Eddie Murphy stand-up routine where he talked about his mama taking off her shoe and throwing it at her kids when they were acting up. He said that the shoe was kid-seeking. If they ran, then it flew after them. It could even fly around corners and get them. He said most times you didn't really get any warning. You might hear this whispering, swishing sound, but by then it was too late. And BAM! it would hit you.
So, if we are ever in a fight together, don't be surprised to see me leaning slightly to one side and holding a shoe!
