The Intimate Encounter with the Sink: Day 1

Around 2:30 this morning, I got up to use the restroom. No, that’s not the significant part of this story, but it lays the groundwork. I didn’t want to turn the light on and disturb my wife, so I went in the dark. Normally, this isn’t an issue as there is enough ambient light coming from the den to act as a night light. I’m also usually pretty steady, but for some reason this time I was a little more groggy than usual, and I ended dropping something on the floor. As I bent over to pick it up, I accidentally slammed my head into the corner of the sink, just missing my eyeball and catching it along my eyebrow instead. However, I hit it with enough force to knock myself unconscious, and then I then tipped backwards and hit the back of my head on the edge of the shower basin.

And that’s how I awoke, crumpled in the corner of the bathroom, in the dark, with no recollection of any it happening, and wondering what I was doing on the floor. I managed to gingerly lift myself up and slide along the wall to the door, so I could call to my spousal unit for help. She came running into the bathroom, switched the light in, and exclaimed, “Oh my god!” That’s when I knew it was bad. And seconds later, I felt the blood start to drip from my eye to confirm it.

My head was spinning, and I was nauseous, so I kept my eyes closed. My spousal unit was freaking out, asking me what I needed. So, I directed her to get me something to stop the bleeding. After she got me a wet rag for my eye, I asked her to look at the back of my head, since a dull throb had started to emanate from there as well. Apparently, I had a laceration there too. I asked her to get me some ice, while I held pressure to both sides of my head. My spousal unit was adamant that we go to the emergency room, but I was just as adamant that I wasn’t going. I didn’t want to wake up my son and make him sit in the emergency room all night while the hospital staff deemed us not enough of an emergency to warrant immediate attention. Been there, done that.

After the flow of blood slowed down, she wanted to at least get me off the floor, but I told her that I needed to lay there a little longer. When the room had stopped spinning, and I felt like I could move without throwing up, I crawled to the bed on my hands and knees. My spousal unit managed to help me into the bed, and then she went to get me something to drink while I continued to hold the ice on my wounds. Since there wasn’t much else to be done, I told her to try to get some rest.

The pain came on gradually and made it virtually impossible for me to get any sleep. Not to mention that I’m a side sleeper, and I would have had to choose between the cut on one side or the cut on the other side of my head. So, I stayed up for the rest of the night with my eyes closed and half listening to the TV drone on in the background, wondering why these things always happen to me. I’m going to take a sick day today. I’m too exhausted to be able to focus on work.