Do you ever suddenly stop in the middle of your day and think, "I feel like I did the same thing yesterday"? And the more you think about it, it seems that every day seems too similar to the day before. You're being efficient and getting done what you are assigned, but still it has lost its excitement. Most days you feel like you're on autopilot, because it doesn't really require 100% conscious thought to perform your duties.
I feel like this. I have large chunks of my day that I can't seem to recall. I have obviously done something as things are getting done, but I have no conscious recollection of doing them. It's as if my body is so well-trained to "be me" that it doesn't really need my brain to be involved anymore. The worst part is that I genuinely want to add something new, something exciting; but I can't. I have found the best, most efficient way to "be me" that I can't think of any other way to do it. Besides, short deviations aren't enough. It is too easy to slide back into the routine.
I'm just tired of having a deja vu experience about a deja vu experience. I feel like I'm living my life two steps behind. I'm sure it was interesting the first time, but now it's just the status quo. Barring changing jobs every other week, how does anyone have enough variety in their job to keep it interesting? I mean, even if you had different experiments, cases, or clients; the underlying processes are still the same. Enough the same to make it stale.
No comments:
Post a Comment