New Job Title

So, along with my promotion, I got a new job title.  I’m now officially a “Consulting Operations Integration Team Lead.”  I told my boss that it was too long, and I was going to need new business cards just so I could remember it.  He told me that I just needed to find an acronym to make it easier and more memorable.  So, he suggested taking the first letter of each word.

I looked at him dead in the eye, and said, “No.” 

He said, “What’s wrong with COITL?” 

I replied, “Nothing’s wrong with it, I just don’t want people feeling like they want to light cigarettes up after they get done talking to me.” 

He looked confused and asked, “What do cigarettes have to do with COITL?” 

“Everything!” I exclaimed.  The girl across from me was losing it.  I added, “Perhaps you shouldn’t be shouting ‘coital’ out across the office.”

“Why?  Is it bad?” he asked.

There was no way he had not heard of this word.  Or was there?  “Look it up.  But don’t use your work computer.”

I saw the blush instantly spread across his face and down his neck.  “Oh…my…god!”

“Yep, pretty much.”

“Okay, that’s bad.  We just need to come up with something else.  How about Consulting Operations Integration Team of the U.S.?”

“So, you think going by COITUS is better?” I asked.

Again, he looked confused.  “Is that a word too?  What does that one mean?”

“Look it up, but don’t use your work computer.”